Exes, Kindly Exit Please

“Let’s not pretend that we’re cool with each other and that we’re friends…” You just read a piece from a semi scathing text sent from a certain someone to another certain (ignorant) someone who tried to act like everything was all kosher. This is a pet peeve of mine which triggered this ensuing blog post. We’re all human and we make mistakes. When you make a mistake that can alter or even end a relationship, you should follow a certain protocol.

You must acknowledge the wrong, attempt to make amends if you wish, and let the other decide if he/she is will to forgo the wrong. If they are unable to get over the mistake and they wish to end the relationship, then let them go and leave them be. It’s that simple. Sadly, there is no tort when it comes to love lost (for you wannabe smarty pants, loss of consortium doesn’t count here). Sure you could try and pin them for IIED but you’ve got to satisfy those outlandish elements. So when you’re underwhelmed by love and it fades along with your naiveté and there is no remedy for you, you need an exit strategy. Not for yourself, but for your ex-friend, ex-boyfriend etc. Sure, you might miss them, but you’ll get over it. So delete those texts, phone numbers, photographs and any other reminders of the person. They may be pleasant at first sight, but these are tricky triggers that will have you remembering the good times you had with the person and then you’ll fall into their trap. Once you’ve cleared the scene of any remnants of them, you can proceed with less caution and go on with life.

The problem comes when they want to pop up into your life again. It’s like that silly carnival game where you keep bopping those toy monsters and once you think they’re dead and gone, they burst into life again. You end up puzzled and you don’t know understand what it is that they don’t get. Why can’t he/she understand that it’s done? El fin. Over. Finito. BYE. You must let them know (especially the ones from Mars because they’re a slower breed at times). Spell it out and if you’re lucky, they’ll get it the first time around. And so, with class and style ask them to kindly exit your life because they mattered, if only, for a little while.

UBU